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the city has ears...

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"If you were single it wouldn't be too bad..." [31 Jul 2007|07:08pm]

Heard from out my living room window, (2 guys walking by):

guy 1:"If you were single it wouldn't be too bad."
guy 2: "Yeah, she goes into heat really early."
1 listenerresponded|respond

[05 Dec 2006|12:05pm]

Today, walking back to my dorm on the UP campus. A guy and his girlfriend walking just ahead of me.

Guy: I don't understand.
Girl: What?
Guy: LMAO?
Girl: giggles
Guy: How is LMAO high school and Haha is college? I don't get it.
2 listenersresponded|respond

[26 Nov 2006|07:11pm]

On the Yellow Line MAX, yesterday, leaving the Saturday Market stop and heading for Pioneer Square. Our cast of characters: Mid-40s tourist couple, their local daughter, a local gentleman heading downtown to get groceries, and my wife, eavesdropping.

Tourist dad: "We didn't see that part," pointing out the window at the Skidmore side of the Market.

Local daughter: "We're going to go up to Pioneer Place so you can shop; you didn't seem too excited about Saturday Market."

Tourist dad: "Well, it's nothing but god-damned hippies everywhere!"

Local gentleman: "And homos, don't forget the homos!"

4 listenersresponded|respond

[06 Nov 2006|11:36am]

Friday night, walking through the Pearl after work. A drunk 40-ish woman being pulled along by a guy asks her friend "Are we slumming? Is this slumming? Do you think we're slumming?"

[06 Nov 2006|03:44am]

this is old, but my friend and i still laugh about it.

we were sitting at a table at the rose festival eating something deep fried most likely when a small group of high school aged people stop and look at the food booths and one of the girls says:

"no, i don't want anything mexican or chinese. i only eat american food. you can only trust places that have american food."

what exactly is american food, anyway?
4 listenersresponded|respond

[26 Oct 2006|04:44am]

Two girls debating at PCC, while walking by at 9pm.

"So, you're saying you don't want your children to have sex, but don't want them to play Dungeons & Dragons.

Isn't that like saying you don't want your kids to get diseases, but would hate to see them vaccinated?"
3 listenersresponded|respond

Marijuana [01 Oct 2006|01:18pm]

Overheard while walking up SW 5th ave Bus Mall:

Man 1: "Hey man do you have a smoke?"

Man 2: "Hell no. If I had money for a smoke I would buy me some MaryJuanna."

Man 1: "Yeah..."

Man 2: "It is so much better for you, all it does is make you hungry."

A Cocker Spaniel in Safeway? [01 Oct 2006|12:22pm]

Two college-aged guys behind me in line at the downtown Safeway were checking out a blond girl passing by...

Guy 1: That girl is kinda cute.
Guy 2: Yeah.
Guy 1: She kinda looks like a cocker spaniel.
1 listenerresponded|respond

Fun on the Bus [04 Sep 2006|07:14am]

On the #17 southbound bus in downtown a few days ago. Two huge crazy women, one wearing the ugliest neon yellow and blue tie-dyed t-shirt. They chatted at the top of their voices for about 20 minutes of my trip around 5 pm.

Some of what they said...Collapse )
I didn't know there was an overhearing comm for Portland, so now that I do I will post my bus trip entertainments:)

On the max downtown the other day [03 Sep 2006|11:38pm]

Two girls sitting next to each other talking amongst themselves...
Girl 1: I love the new mojito drink, it only has 60 calories!
Girl 2: That's so funny, my mom didn't even know alcohol had calories. I'm like, 'C'mon mom, why do you think they call it a beer belly?'

[01 Sep 2006|12:07pm]

a little girl at India Grill on Burnside:

"Ben Franklin is the DEVIL!!"

Totally, little girl. Totally.
3 listenersresponded|respond

today on the streetcar... [07 Mar 2006|12:56pm]

[ mood | amused ]

(this community is awesome)

overheard today on the streetcar, shortly after a couple guys had left the train...

"my god it's so rude how they were just talking about people like that"


unfortunately worded. [24 Feb 2006|06:12pm]

confused rubinesque lady: "Can you tell me where the so-and-so building is?"
info desk clerk:"Well, do you know where the bookstore is?"
confused lady: "Uhh, no."
clerk: "But you know where the McDonalds is, right?"
confused lady: "Well, yeah."
1 listenerresponded|respond

[07 Feb 2006|08:28am]


overheard last saturday in the meier&frank fitting rooms between a woman seated on the bench and her daughter in the stall next to me:

mother: we should get some silver shoes to go with your shirt.
daughter: shoes the same color as my shirt? mother, what year is this?
mother: the year you get some class, hows that, chica!
daughter: i'll just wear my bob marley shirt. i'll put some rhinestones in his eyes. how's that for class?

i hate shopping with my mom, too.

2 listenersresponded|respond

at Dot's [15 Jan 2006|09:00pm]

Random Guy: "You'd better not send any more tracers at me or you will be in big trouble. I mean it. Trouble." *fingerpointing*
My Guy: "uhhhhhhhh, I won't? I'm sorry?"

Random Guy walks back to his seat and stares our table down for the next twenty minutes.

[10 Nov 2005|03:09pm]

[ mood | amused ]

I was gonna post this a few days ago, but I forgot x_x;

At Lloyd Center, in the handicapped stall of the women's bathroom:

Little Boy: I don't wanna be a boy, I wanna be a girl.
Mom: Really? Why? Boys are so cool!
Little Boy: No! I don't wanna be a boy!

o.o future transexual? ^^;

(x-posted places)

5 listenersresponded|respond

cops [06 Nov 2005|01:07pm]

in a breakfast joint, regarding the murder of the random naked drugged up guy on top of a police car:

cop:"I'm not saying it's justified, I'm just saying I probably would have done the same thing"
cop:"I'm not sure why they shot him so many times, but I imagine it had to do with where the bullets hit"
cop et al.: *raucous laughter*

There was much more, but I must say I've never felt such a deep seated urge to throw my coffee mug at someone's head in a crowded restaurant.

as i was leaving

friend-of-cop: "You know, people just don't have the opportunity to have good experiences with the police"
me (out of earshot): You think?!?!?
4 listenersresponded|respond

Crazy Maxline rant [22 Sep 2005|11:04am]

[ mood | awake ]

Possible homeless person gets off of max near sw 9th heading to hillsboro screams "Im just trying to make a point" to invisible person, then stomps off.

1 listenerresponded|respond

[08 Sep 2005|07:45am]

Last night around 10:30 at the downtown McD's. A group of young women, rather tough looking, as two of them depart the main group for the restroom.

"Hurry up, that's my last tampon!"


Did she need it back for something???

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